What a day so far – woke up to a blinding but windless rainstorm that lasted about 20 minutes. It had gone dead calm in the night so JollyDogs had drifted all over the place, and after the rain (what Isabel refers to as a “clearing up shower”) was done we had a clean boat, lots of wet stuff in the cockpit, and flat calm water with great visibility. The anchor was just below the bows, the chain wandering all over the place before returning to the bridle hook.
Looked like a perfect morning to get a good SUP workout in. Since my encounter with Mr. Shark, who turned an $1100 Red 9’8” SUP into vinyl shrapnel, we’ve learned a bit about shark behavior and the new JollyDogs decree is there will be no SUP paddling during the hours from dawn until 0730 and 1630 until dark, shark feeding time when their behavior changes and becomes more aggressive. Kind of like the first day of hunting season back home, when itchy fingered hunters are more apt to shoot anything that moves. I recall hearing of farmers who would paint “COW” on the side of their animals lest some overly enthusiastic hunter mistake it for a deer. For the uninitiated, deer look remarkably different from cows, but perhaps they fail to mention that in some hunting schools.
So off Isabel went this morning while I called my little sister with the Iridium Go satphone feature to wish her a happy birthday. Calling a hardline telephone generally results in a pretty decent call, while calling a cell phone results in frustration and thoughts of suicide. Something to do with things called CODECs, whatever they are. Anyway, Lisa answered while I was explaining to her answer machine that I wasn’t a telemarketer, and even though the call dropped three times we had a great conversation. Somewhere during the third try Isabel returned from her abbreviated paddling workout dripping wet and missing her fancy new sunnies.
Hey – this story kind of reminds me of an old Jimmy Buffet song about Mr. Bear, where he took Jimmy’s sunglasses, and Jimmy noted he was really pissed off because he had just stolen them from an Eckerds Drug Store.
Anyway, Isabel reported that the same silly lemon shark that had attacked my SUP had come after her, and in her efforts to ward off the demon by whacking at it with her mighty carbon fiber paddle she had knocked herself off balance and fallen into the water. That’s where Mr. Shark lives, I politely pointed out. Isabel reported that she quickly scrambled back onto the SUP (I’m imagining levitation here) and Mr. Shark vamoosed. During the kerfuffle she lost her fancy new sunnnies, but she was pretty sure she knew where they were and if her darling husband was willing to dinghy over there with her then don his mask and snorkel and retrieve them, she would be eternally grateful.
Well her darling husband has had about enough of this idiotic lemon shark with its bad attitude, and to show it who had an even worse attitude out came the pistola, a short spear gun that’s easy to train on a target in a danger close environment. Off we went and darned if Isabel didn’t spot her beloved sunnies on a sandy bottom in about 10’ of water. Ever the Romeo to his Juliette, her darling husband donned his snorkel kit, armed the spear gun, then after looking around for a bit did a bunch of huffing and puffing then launched from the dinghy into Mr. Shark’s world to retrieve the investment.
Success! No sign of that bloody shark either – maybe he realized that for me it was the first day of hunting season. It ain’t the last, and that turkey might find out what it’s like to be “consumed” by his own siblings and parents. We’re big on recycling here, so that’s just fine by us. No waste.
Great hearing from you Al – my old FTE friend who so kindly provided hanger space for our little RV-6 back in the day. Hope those stereo speakers are still filling that hanger with great sound!
Happy birthday Weez! E-mail me the author’s name!
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